Book #2: The Witch

The second book in my parody-series is inspired by book 3 in the Sweet Valley Twins series, The Haunted House (They could have called it The New Girl, but that was book *6*, with Brooke Dennis). It takes place during the first of many Halloweens in the series... (and it is creepy because Elizabeth and her friend Amy both dress as CLOWNS, AAAGH WHY). Nora Mercandy moves to Sweet Valley to live with her grandmother, who all the kids say is a witch because her house is run down and because they have nothing better to do (Internet hasn't been invented yet) than make up shit about a harmless old lady. They taunt Nora mercilessly, calling her a witch too (no originality). Especially the Unicorns, the club to which Jessica (the more annoying twin) belongs. This was in the beginning of the series when the Unicorns were meaner. 

At the end, it is revealed that Nora's grandfather is a retired magician who had a stroke, not a zombie as previously thought (these 12-year-olds are dumb/ horrible). And all is forgiven, even though all the kids treated Nora abominably and she would likely have some post-traumatic-stress to deal with. To which I say WHAT THE FUCK? (To add insult to injury, Nora's character was barely mentioned in later books. Although I think she did join the school newspaper with Elizabeth.) Clearly, this book's message was: Outcasts Deserve to be Taunted, and Will Roll Over and Take It.

So I wrote my own version, with my character Piper disguised as the new girl (with a new name, Fallon Morrison, just to be random) and she really was a witch BWA HA (hence the title... all of my titles are deceptively boring/vague, to conceal the madness inside). So she could get back at her tormentors (with her supernatural powers), especially snobby Lila of the entitled club.* Because that was much more interesting and a lot less annoying. In my story, Piper-the-new-girl's grandmother is a witch too, her grandfather is an evil sorcerer, and her boyfriend from Book 1, Tobey, appears too, as a demon. (I like demons as well as witches. Vampires are #3 on my list of supernatural creatures. Don't care about zombies, werewolves, or ghosts).
Also I put in an inside joke from "The Office" (US) because I love Creed Bratton. (Sometimes I think of actors when I write these characters, and then think, Stop That, Because You Can't Cast a Movie of a Book You Wrote That Isn't Even a Real Thing. I mean, you can, but it'll never happen. Creed would play Fallon's grandfather, and be awesome).

*Lila makes Nora be her slave, they actually use that word, which made me think, they wouldn't have done that with Maria Slater, the Only Black Character (who appeared many books later, in #50), but she was conveniently a former movie star so that made it okay for her to exist in Sweet Valley. Sweet Valley was super white for a California town... shouldn't there have been more Hispanic characters (who weren't just the help)? This was acceptable literature for kids in the late 80s, which makes me furious now. Rarr.

I dedicated this one to my childhood best friend. We used to play Witches when we were little.